Dep.

Haven't blogged in a while. Met up Mimi at the busstop and took the 54 to Minnie and Lovie's. Saw Uju on the bus. Omg. LOL. Got there and sat around while they set up. Saw Mireya and practiced our scenes. Got a text from Edgar and it said he was across from us. Whut. LOL. He was there for his dj gig. Eli came and me and Mireya were surprised.xD Chilled. Blahblahblah. Nerves were hitting me pretty hard before we performed. I barely had my monologue down and the audience consisted of old people and children, no teenagers who would actually understand. The pep talk E gave us when he found out that we didn't want to perform anymore. <3 Got rid of most my nerves, for sure. It helped a lot. Thanks.(: Performed.

Audience was hella dry, but i didn't mess up. They liked Eli's though, cause he freestyled and there were these black kids. Ahaha. More performances. Danced w/ Mireya and Janelle a little bit. Then they danced with John Avalos. I didn't want to but Edgar dragged me in near the end. Helped clean up then decided to head to DP for a while. DEP. LMAO. We are so DEP. DEP crew though. Ahaha. Got to DP, hella packed. Saw some naked 50 year old butt. Cute. We were hungry and decided to go to BJ's cause we wanted some legit food. Got fries and shared a milkshake. Listened to music and chatted. Couldn't finish the fries. Decided to leave cause it was time for us to go and E was really sick and tired. Walked to the J stop w/Mimi and took it. Blahblahblah, went home.

Pretty good day.(:

How lovely.

I wake up to a bad sore throat the morning before my performance. Now it is night time and i have to perform in the morning. Guess who's voice is slowly leaving. Lucky me.

So much to worry about.

Why the fuck do i even try?

Fuck this shit. Even my best isn't good enough so what the hell am i suppose to do?

My life

is so annoying and frustrating right now.

Sometimes, all it takes is a good cry over nothing in particular to make you feel better about everything.

Get the tears out so the smile can shine through.

Lust.

I feel like i don't belong in this family. It's not even a damn family. We don't talk-only small talk and stupid things.
This isn't a home.

How do i look, guys?

The interview was pretty good. For the group activities, i wasn't the best one, but the best one isn't competition anyway because she's part of a different city. And in the one on one interview, i felt like i did really good. I hope i get in.(:

Everyone likes venting to me.

I don't even know why.

Something about you.

Maybe it's the way you make me feel like I'm a child again. It's like you're reminding me to live my teenage years before they're gone. Maybe it's the way i step out of my comfort zone. Maybe it's the way you can hold intellectual conversations. Maybe its the way you play guitar. Maybe it's the way you cook. Maybe it's because you're a big dork. Maybe it's because you're considerate. It could possibly be that you're the sweetest person i know, and you're oh so modest. Or that you're so selfless. Can't forget the way you smile or the way you smell.

There's just something about you.

Why am i not ever finishing my dinner lately? I've been eating so little this past week. ._.

A day spent with you

is a day well spent.

We're just a bunch of stupid teenagers.

So i know i haven't been blogging much because everyday is the same and nothing interesting is happening. Well, today was kind of interesting. So in Theater, we got kicked out of our room rudely by the "white devil". Long story, LMAO. Basically, that hoe was rude as hell. And during break, me and Jonatan were messing around and 'arguing' then Edgar stood in front of me and played along also. Then i got onto his back and he started running. Next thing we know, we're collapsing onto the floor. We were on the floor laughing in pain. My wrist was swollen and throbbing, and his jeans were ripped open and he was bleeding. Oh my god. My hip is bruised too. Ahahha. That shit is so funny though. Then after, he cut the rest of his pants and made them into 'hipster shorts'. I love Theater.

We're just a bunch of stupid teenagers and i wouldn't have it any other way. Ironically, you bring out the child in me when usually I'm this mature 15 year old who needs to let loose more.

Hehe.

-to Jose- "I tell them bitches when to blow."
-to Jesse- "Blow, please."

"I'm not good with this stuff like you are."
"It's okay, honey. Just blow when i tell you to."

:D

& "Don't worry, we won't tell you that you suck."
-to ChristianRomero- "..out loud."

LMFAO.

What i really want right now is to laugh really hard. Like extremely, clapping hands like retarded seal, gasping for breath, laughing so hard no sound comes out.

If you could help me, it would be very much appreciated.

I finally understand what Freddy means when he tells me I read really fast.

I do read fast and i stumble over my words. Nervous habit, i suppose. Gotta fix that.

Just for future reference.

SinntoxMimi 9:40 pm
i♥being gay

And I'm not saying that I'm any better than you. Sometimes i have motives that are just stupid and i play the fool.

We have no communication skills.

Which leads us into fighting and misunderstandings. Shit. Okay, i was wrong for jumping to conclusions and yelling at you. You were wrong for being so damn immature and hanging up on me and giving me the cold shoulder.

Let's pretend this never happened.

Pretty good day.(:

Today was a pretty good day. I cried in Houston's class because of the movie, To Live. Omg, that little boy was way too cute. We had a connection; why did he have to die?! "Cute people shouldn't die." LOL. And gym was nice today. Ms.Glassman wanted to get back at the boys for doing nothing yesterday so she let us lay down and do nothing while they run to flaunt it to them. (: So chill. If only it were a tab bit sunnier. Me and Carmen even wrote a song about me "Oh, that girl, she's so fine. 1 2 3 4, she's a dime." LMAO, losers.(: In Cossick, we acted out our scenes on stage. It was lovely being on stage again. :D Disaster drill was okay. Afterschool, went to get food with Mimi then went to meeting. I swear, everything he says annoys me so much. ROFL. I'm going to community service for the first time in a long time tomorrow. Kaybye.(:

I don't love you, I'm just passing the time.

You could love me if i knew how to lie.

But who could love me? I am out of my mind.

Where are my painkillers?

Why must it be me who gets te killer cramps? Fuck, it woke me up so many times last night. I thought if I went to sleep, I wouldn't have to deal with them until I woke up, but I guess it hurts so much that it wakes me up a few times during the night.

Turn your pain into art.

Wondercon virgin.

Last night, i couldn't sleep. Fuck, it took me like 3 hours to fall alseep. ._. This morning, i woke up to get ready, Mireya texted me and i met her on 23rd and we walked to Edgar's house just talking about boys. I told her about j and she told me bout her guys. Man, boys. Can't live with them, can't live without them. But it's helluh true, we hurt them on purpose while we get hurt by stupid things they don't even realize they do. Yeah, got to Edgar's house and when we were outside, Mimi called them to tell him we couldn't make it and he hella believed us. APRIL FOOLS. :D We went inside and fooled even more people. LOL at Freddy! He didn't pick up the phone the first time, then i tried to call him and he turned off his phone. LMFAOO! Omg. We got Edgar's cowboy hats then we headed out. :D We decided to walk cause the bus was taking a long time. I like it when you put flowers in my hair. (: We went into Party City and got a bunch of candy.

Then we caught the bus. Shit, that gum was sour as fuck. It was so sour, it burned and i was so scared to bite into it more. LMFAO. Gio is helluh funny though! xD Got to Wondercon, got some free Nesquik. :D Got in and me and Mimi got our tickets while Edgar and Gio picked theirs up. Walked around. Coolcool. Saw Bryan and said hi to him. :D Walked around more. Me and Edgar got raped by Mimi in that one game. I didn't even know which one was me! LMFAO. Yeah, i'm an oldschool came consuls girl. xD Omg, saw Hello Kitty Monopoly! Gio and Edgar kept telling me when they saw Asian things like pokemon and hellokitty and stuff. LMFAO. Then we saw like this porn magazine (i think that's what it was) with only Asian Women and Edgar goes like "Hey, it's porn magazines of Lingling's kind." LMFAO screw you. (: Gio bought only one thing today, but he took like helluh other shit. A mustache, 3 tshirts, i don't even know what else! ROFL. I felt like i needed to sit down so badly, like the feeling i get when i go shopping and it's like a mixture of a cramp and stomach ache. Like more of wanting to throw up. So we left and walked to the Froyo place. I think i tasted blood in my mouth but i'm not sure. Went inside and sat down to watch the stuff while Gio got me a cup of water.

Talked about what went down last night. Omg. You is scary as fuck when you're fucked up but you're also kind of funny as hell. LMAO. But still, scary as hell. Dunno what else to say. Ahaha. Went to Delores Park instead of going back to Wondercon cause they had a birthday party. Party was alright. I really hope i don't smell like smoke or weed. I didn't do anything, promise! I didn't even drink at all. I'm such a good girl. :D But i did play with Quinn's gun a little bit. Ahahah. Nothing big though. No bullets in it.(: Then Grr looked kinda depressed so me, Mimi, and him went away to talk. We had a really good heart to heart. I would've never expected that from you but I'm glad we all talked. Then he walked me and Mimi to the busstop and we took the J. She left and i sat down. I totally forgot i had a pixie stick in my hair and when i went to fix my hair, it flicked out of my hair and landed on the lady next to me's lap. LMAO. Oops. Then i went home. My butt is brown.): Ahaha.

Get out of my head. Someone like you would never be interested in someone like me.